Dream Company, Nightmare Boss — Part X - Escape From Shit Mountain

How About Some Future Job Sabotage?

I started browsing other jobs within the company about six months after I started. When you’re unhappy with a situation, you can’t help but look for ways out. Looking toward a better future was partially how I stayed sane. However, I was so focused on getting out, I made amateur mistakes when applying to a couple roles— with extraordinary support at my back—and bungled the opportunities.

When my colleague, Cindy, posted her two-week notice in the fall of 2016, my need to get out grew urgent. I was tasked with all of her responsibilities, working my job, and as far as Greg Everage was concerned, still being his assistant. 

About a month after she left, I saw a job posting that interested me. When I asked confidantes if it would be a good fit, everyone resoundingly agreed. I chatted with someone on the team, getting confused "What the hell!? No!" answers to important questions like, "Is your manager an awful person who belittles and insults their female colleagues?" I'm paraphrasing.

Knowing the manager, Seth, on this prospective team received the seal of approval from many trusted individuals, I applied for the job, knowing this would be my last attempt. If this job didn't work out, I would quit at the end of the year.

I soon interviewed Seth and each team member; feeling good after the interviews, I felt that hope, my passion stir again.

A couple weeks later, Seth let me know that we reached the point where he would need to call Greg to work out a transition plan. I was elated. I let him know that Greg knew I applied for the position and would support the transfer.

I’m thinking if you’re Greg, you want to get rid of this rock in your shoe, this glass in your foot, this blister on your toe. This person who calls you out whenever you’re rude, disrespectful, inappropriate... I didn’t expect Greg to give me a glowing review, but I expected he’d be neutral. 

A couple days after Seth's chat with Greg, two of my colleagues asked to speak with me. They each told me the same thing: Seth contacted them to discuss what Greg said about me. He advised Seth NOT to hire me, citing that he's already down a team member and needs my help. Additionally, and most egregiously, he told Seth:

• I’m difficult to work with,
• I’m not a team player, and...
• I don’t respect authority. 

Ironically, all of those traits were inherent to Greg. I worked hard to be a valued team member, I enjoyed helping those around me, and I respected the authority at work—but I did not ACCEPT when I was bullied or harassed. Moreover, I was asked to work and participate in many projects outside of my group because colleagues touted my work ethic and insightful contributions.

The narrative that Greg put out was false and could cost me the job. But what could I do? Report slander to HR? And be told (these are not hypotheticals):

• Oh, Greg didn't mean what he said negatively but rather to look out for you and your best interest. 
• Greg has a mother in his life, and she's woman—like you! He respects woman because of that biological fact.
• Katie, you need to learn to be subordinate to Greg. There is a hierarchy that you have to respect.

HR was the last place I would go by choice.

It felt so unfair. There would be no escaping Greg and his control over my fate. The only escape was to resign and go home...

I heard nothing for weeks. I held onto hope, and during a call with a producer at one of our agencies, he said, "Congratulations on your new position!"

"Excuse me? What new position?"

"Greg said that you were moving to Redmond and accepted a new role. That's so good for you! You deserve it so much. We're all very happy to hear that you're...well, you know you deserve thiis."

"Oh, I mean, I- I didn't know the offer was official, but thank you for telling me! This is wonderful news!" 

And that's how I learned I got the job. A producer at an external agency told me during a phone call. I got an official email from HR a couple days later.

Seth was savvy enough to realize Greg was lying and kind enough to listen to my peers—the truth made itself apparent. Seth had good conversations with each colleague about who I was as a person and an employee. My colleagues conveyed that I was a hard worker; that I adored the company, the games, and the people; and that I had a lot of promise. Unfortunately, I worked for a terrible manager, a person not well-liked in the organization, who took out his frustration on me. A situation that no one could (or ever did) succeed in. 

I learned that Dan, the senior vice president who helped me, also conveyed to the vice president of Seth's group that I was the victim of a shitty situation—an ambitious, charismatic worker stuck under the leadership of an incompetent, insecure manager.

In early January 2017, I accepted my new role.

 

Let's Update the Job...Again

During my last week working for Greg, HR conducted a team improvement meeting. Out of the topics discussed, one main point of confusion was my job and how it fit in with the broader team and organization. Each person present—myself, two of our Washington colleagues, and Greg—had a different summary of my job.

Before I started, there was the job I applied to: a contributor and creator of marketing content. After I expressed confusion and frustration over what I was doing (admin work), Greg and HR updated the role to focus on managing video content (something he knew I had little experience in). That was the first update to my job title and responsibilities, which happened within six months of my hire date. That's the "2014 Job Update."

How can four people have four different understandings of a job? Greg put the blame on me. He said that someone must want to learn to succeed in the role. You must have drive, and I didn't exhibit any. 

I didn't argue because I didn't need to. I accepted my new role and was set to move on from the nightmare; but also, I was so damn tired of his antagonist ways. I sat back and listened, unbothered. If Greg was a car, I was the roadkill under it, and he drove back and forth to confirm the kill. My little roadkill soul had already ascended. The body can't feel any pain.

My two teammates came to my defense expressing that I regularly asked for chances to learn and to be more involved in projects. I wasn’t given the resources to learn or opportunities to actively participate in what the team worked on. They expressed that the "2014 Job Update" was the equivalent of a manager with several years of video experience. They also stated the expectation for me to manage—really, to understand—the details and nuances of their projects with no hands-on experience was unreasonable.

Ultimately, the job was updated again. In less than three years, one job had three different descriptions, and "Update #3" would be used to recruit my replacement. I asked my colleagues to ensure my replacement would be protected from Greg, as much as they could offer protection from afar. 

During that last week, I interviewed my potential replacements. I wanted to warn them: "Don't accept this job! You will lose your sanity and self-worth because of Greg. He's going to confuse you, hurt you, frustrate you. You deserve better than what's coming." Feeling wary, I resolved that they would have to find out on their own like I did. 

Also during that week, I trained Cindy's replacement, Alana. She would eventually learn I brought Greg's problematic behavior to HR's attention, and it did me more harm than good. 

The Final Day

On my last day, Greg came by and told me how supportive he was of my move. He walked over, arms extended, posed to hug me. What's the equivalent of the kiss of death for hugs—the embrace of doom? I put my arm out, hand stiff. No. Do not touch me, was my body language. And for once, he respected the signal. He wished me good luck and said he looked forward to seeing me thrive in my new role. Liar. Absolute two-faced liar. I smiled and thanked him. My next thought was, I never want to think about you ever again.

Gratitude

My new manager and team believed in me, believed in the truth. I am thankful that in the face of doubt, they trusted my ability, my honesty, and my loyalty. My confidence was shot. But over time, I reverted back to the person I was before working for Greg.

My teammates and new leader, Seth, helped build me back up. I remember once we were chatting about a project, and he stopped me as I asked permission to do something.

"Katie, why do you keep asking to do things, to make decisions, really, to do your job?" 

I was conditioned to be submissive, to tiptoe around my boss, to be apprehensive to take the lead without being on a short leash. I was afraid of speaking negatively about Greg, so I attributed it to growing pains with the new position. 

Seth said, "We hired you for this job because we know you can do it. And you are. So, do your job. If you're going off the rails, we'll let you know. And if you're going off the rails so early on, that's probably because we didn't equip you with the right tools or resources to do so. But for now, trust yourself, the way that we trust you. If you succeed, that's a reflection of our leadership; and if you fail, that's ALSO a reflection of our leadership." 

I needed to hear that so badly.

Those years working on that team were all I ever hoped for. I had teammates and a leader that empowered me to succeed, encouraged me to learn and grow, and helped me set goals and achieve them. I look back fondly at that time.

Well, what happened with Greg? Did he ever get his just deserts at this company?

Next up: How He (Finally) Got Fired